"Each morning when I awake, I experience again a supreme pleasure - that of being Salvador Dali."

-Salvador Dali.  The drawing to the right is called "The City of the Drawers."  I fell in love with this drawing because I think it says alot about myself, and probably humanity as a whole.  I can say this because I have found that in a classroom full of people, I will not be the only person thinking a certain question.  I figure I'm like most people, on a whole; I'm not that out there. 

  The theory of the drawers is simple and self explainitory.  I just like to think about what I keep in my drawers, and what other people keep in thiers'. 

   I didn't mean to make myself and the rest of humanity sound all the same, monotone, boring.  All that I meant was that we all have drawers.  What we keep in them is completely different and unique for each person.  I keep this in mind when I deal with people on all different levels.  This drawing helps me remember that even the people that I feel I have nothing in common with, I do.

 

"Be a Simple Kind of Man, Be Something You Love and Understand"

-Lynyrd Skynyrd of coarse.  "Simple Man."  This is a song that means alot to me, and has since I first heard it when I was a freshman at Defiance College.  A friend of mine played it in the car while we were on our way to get a pint of Ben and Jerry's ice cream to eat while we watched Tom and Jerry.  We did this everyday.  I suppose the song hit so close to home because at the time I felt like it applied to me.  I felt when I was in the car with my friend, just driving, that  my life was simple and I loved it.  I loved who I was at the time; totally myself.  No walls holding me back, no drama tying me down.  I look back on it now and chuckle because this friend that I was with probably had no idea how much the little time I spent with him meant to me, and why.  I still think of him now and then, it's been at least five years since I've seen him.  I talk to him online, and he still has my number and he'll text me now and then, but he'll never know how much he impacted my life. 

Thinking about it now, I realize that this is what I have to get back to, whether my friend is there or not.  Lynyrd says, "now don't you worry, you'll find yourself.  Follow your heart, and nothing else."  That is how I used to be, and what I believed in; following my heart.  But for the past few years my heart has been so blinded by manipulation that I couldn't find the light to follow it.  So here I go again, starting over.

"Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly"

I guess the reason I havent done art, or gone back to school, or really tried building up my clientelle at work is because I am terrified to fail.  I always think, "oh that would be awesome to do, I could totally do that" but when it comes down to it I talk myself out of it, thinking "there's no way I'll finish that, and where would I even start?" 
An artist that I greatly look up to and have mentioned in my blog before, is Tara McPherson.  I guess she is inspirational to me because she created a theme and a feeling for her work and then ran with it. 

 I always think wonder if I could do that, I could sell some of the work I do.  I just have to dare to be a little more creative, to go a little deeper. 
I'm still in bed today, but as soon as I'm up and around I'll be working on this.  No more letting the fear of failure control my life.  *!*

"I have wasted my hours"

This is a quote from Leonardo da Vinci, which I feel applies to my life in some way.  I spent so much time wishing and trying to make love work, and ignoring everything and everyone else.  Now that I look back and can see clearly, I realize, agian, that I should have kept things black and white.   I was making excuses for why our love wasnt working and I was trying way too hard-hard enough that I forgot everything that matters.

I like this quote because it reminds me that living a life filled with regret will get you nowhere.  I regret the hours that I missed with the people who truly love me, and the hours that I missed doing things that I truly enjoy.  But I have learned from my mistake and now it is time to move on and make up for all of those things that I regret.

I'm stuck in bed today but as soon as I feel better I will be working on more art to show off!  Until then, I think I will keep blogging about what inspires me.  *!*

"There's no chance unless you take one."

This is a line from the theme song of the Nickelodeon show ICarly.  Love that friggin show.  Oh the simple things that make me happy.  Someone once told that they fell in love with me because I appreciated the little things, and therefore could find joy in almost anything. 
Needless to say, they fell out of love with me and my life changed.  For the longest time I couldn't even see those little things that made me so happy, I was so wrapped up in the grays of life.  Keep things black and white.  It's much easier that way. 
But things are now in the black and white and I'm getting back to being happy, to being myself.  I'm getting back to my family and friends, the people who matter.  I'm caring about myself more, whereas I wasn't before.  And I'm falling in love with the things I used to love all over again. 
Such as art and music.  I've started drawing again.  My mom keeps telling me she wished there was a way to display my art, so I decided I would slowly start making a blog for it, and my friends and family can give me feed back and tell me what they think.  Some of the artwork is not my own idea, I took ideas from different artists and put them together.  I will give credit where credit is due.   Well, here is my first picture...it is not entirely finished but it's so close I feel like I can post it.  I could use some feed back as to what to put in the top panels of the carousel.  Here goes I hope you like it! These images are by Mark Ryden and Tara McPherson. 

I suppose I used these images from these artist because it has been so long since I've done any art, I wasn't sure if I would fail or not.  So I took out most of the creative aspect of it and just tried out my skills.  I'm working on another color pencil picture that is all my own, and I cant wait to post it.  As I recovering from a small procedure I had done today, I'm not sure I'll be able to work on it today or not.  But I'll post it soon.  I hope you like this picture, even though it is not my own idea, I love the feel of the picture and the simple things about it.  I hope you do too.  Talk to you soon. *!*